I think I’m at a strange place in my life right now.
I often convince myself that I am happy to be alone. That I’m happy with the routine I have given myself and stuck to for the past couple of years. And most of the time it’s true. I like my own space and I like spending time on my own. I think that I am a fairly independent person, and I like living a simple life. I don’t need much at all.
But sometimes, and only sometimes, I do feel lonely.
I have a hard time meeting people, though. It’s not that I don’t get along with people, because I do, I get along with people fine. It’s just when I actually do meet people, and I’m getting to know them for the first time, it always seems so fake. I don’t want to sit there for two hours and have a conversation with somebody about what each of us do for a job, what we do in our spare time, how many brothers and sisters we have etc etc etc. It’s all so repetitive, and I feel like I’m just meeting different versions of the same people over and over again.
I find myself sitting there, not really giving a crap about what the other person is saying. I’m literally completely uninterested in other people.
And that's quite worrying, I'd say.
Monday, August 1, 2011
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