Oh My Friend Lonliness.

I'm not scared. Not technically. I'm not sure what I am.
This would be the first time I have spent more than ten minutes alone in my new apartment. I can't describe to you how it makes me feel, because it is something that I haven't experienced before. It's not a feeling I'm used to. I decided to put music on, not because the apartment is scary or eerie, but just because music always tends to bring a slight sense of a presence.
I don't really think I have generally been a very independant person before. I mean, I have always had my own opinions, and acted, dressed, spoke, danced and understood everything the way I want. I don't have a problem with having to deal with situations on my own, and I always listen to myself before I listen to others. I prefer to figure things out for myself and not let other people's opinions effect my own. But I mean, when it comes to being around people - I always have been. I grew up with a brother and a sister. My mum was there for a while, but Dad always has been. Now I'm in the deep end, and I'm not going to let myself drown, but I suppose I can find myself struggling at times. I'm not sure I like being on my own sometimes. I think that I'm just the kind of person who needs to be around people, or talking to people, or even electronically communicating with people. Not all the time, no. But more often than not.

I guess it's just like a skill,
or perhaps even something I suppose I'll just have to start getting used to.